Salisbury resident shares how he managed his wife’s Alzheimer’s before her passing
'Til Death do us Part
MARYLAND – June is Brain and Alzheimer’s Awareness Month and according to data from the state of Maryland, about 110,000 seniors 65 years or older are living with dementia.
They say the mind is a terrible thing to waste, but what happens when it involuntarily wastes away? Robert Snyder of Salisbury says this happened to his loving wife a little over a year ago,
tells us how he’s managed to cope after witnessing the effects of this debilitating disease.
Robert and Connie were married for 40 years, and it wasn’t until his wife’s late 70’s when he thought there might be something wrong. “I didn’t think too much about it, I didn’t really equate it as Alzheimer’s I just thought, we always laugh about its senior moment.” But this was unfortunately no laughing matter. “Things were getting progressively worse, was she violent, verbal slamming door going to the other room and slamming the door- and then at one point hitting me, and that’s when I realized oh, I got to be careful because you don’t want to fly off the handle yourself.”
In June of 2017, she was diagnosed and by November, Robert moved her to a memory care facility. This took a toll on him mentally. “You’re trying to be as helpful as you can, because this is your partner, and has been your partner for 40-plus years, but at the same time, this is not the person, and that’s what makes it very difficult, this is not the person you knew.”
Dr. Jeremy Gill of Atlantic General says one should pay close attention when looking at seniors and brain health, and not to write it off as a ‘Senior Moment’. “The early symptoms of Alzheimer’s include personality change, people who never had a history of anxiety or depression they become more agitated and moodier. They’ll have memory loss, more than forgetting where you put your keys.”
Dr. Gill says many patients will also have personality changes that can make them more impulsive, and, Robert can attest to what he saw with his own wife, and how it broke his heart and how it still affects him today. “The hardest moment Tierra, is accepting the inevitable… As a caregiver, and people will tell you this you’ll go before they will, because of the stress that it puts on you. I lost about 20-25 lbs. trying to take care of her.” Dr. Gill of Atlantic General says risk factors of early onset dementia are smoking, obesity, social isolation, and physical inactivity — and he says these are conditions that can be cured.
Connie passed in April of 2023. Robert says the reason he became involved with the Alzheimer’s Association on the Eastern Shore, was to encourage others and to stay active. “I’m trying to help other to realize you’re not alone, there are resources out there go to your friends, go to your family, look for support.” Robert says he strongly recommends 50-year-olds and younger invest in long-term care insurance and that situations like this can be a serious financial burden and one doesn’t need that added stress.”
